I must point out that I spent six months of the year hiking, a month in India and two travelling the States with little money. The rest of the time I was trying to save as much as possible. So I ended up with a grand total of two new albums and a handful of songs. Only in the last month have I gathered any sense of what happened this year musically. Phoenix got massive? Finally. Animal Collective and Grizzley Bear? Still don't care. Wavves? Probably. The Mint Chicks are all that matters.
The Mint Chicks - Screens
Best release yet from the greatest band of all time. Yep. Prove me wrong. Perfect progression from the massive (in New Zealand anyway, and that's all that matters really) success of 'Crazy? Yes! Dumb? No!'. Slap everyone in the face with prefect, hazy, spacey troublegum pop. When Michael left the band to explore England I was sad. Then the '2010' and this appeared:"It was recorded and mixed on six different computer screens, which is not that many when you think about it. Since we're a band from the future that travelled back in time to record I would say that the album is very derivative of bands that don't exist yet. You know what I mean? Since reality is a tragic disappointment and the world is mostly built from people so moronic they'll never figure out why they're such square dicks, I'm happy to say that it's completely out of touch with reality in the most encouraging way I ever could have imagined. I'm thrilled to say that the grumpy, bearded fat guys with black hoodies, karate shoes and sub-atomic penises will not get it. We made this record for creepy teenaged girls with one glass eye."
Then I went to Nepal and forgot about a lot of things. Got the album on it's release only cause I was there and it's been with me since. And Michael returned. Perfect.
A real review can be found at this awesome site: polaroidsofandroids.com, but you should just buy the album. Trust me.
Québec - Together We Have Grown, Together We Shall Bloom
Not 2009 but probably listened to this more than anything. Should have made more of an effort before they split up. Amazing.
The Hood Internet.
Dudes are amazing. Best of the year were:
Save Me Concubine (Ghostface Killah vs Beirut)
The T-Pains Of Being Pure At Heart (T-Pain vs The Pains Of Being Pure At Heart)
Good Ol' Fashion Rump Shaker (Beastie Boys vs Matt & Kim)
Everything here.
Friendly Fires - Skeleton Boy
No, the single was released this year. Perfect. Amazing video too.
I'm sure the albums put out by Mika Miko, Graf Orlock, Cold Cave, Moneen, Talons (Sydney), Phoenix, The Horrors and Arctic Monkeys are at least good, I just haven't got there yet.
Words of the Year
Dr. Paul R. Ehrlich - The Population Bomb
Some worrying maths is whipped out here. Originally written in the mid/late sixties (revised many times since), if population growth rates at the time had continued unchanged there would be 60, 000, 000, 000, 000, 000 humans by the year 2800. Sixty million billion. 100 humans on every square metre of earth, oceans included. Sure, it's a little outdated, but the basic concerns are still very much with us. There are too many people. And more keep coming.
Jean-Paul Satre - L'Âge de Raison (The Age of Reason)
Two of the most irritating characters ever in Mathieu Delarue and Ivich Serguine and one of the most interesting, Daniel Sereno. The super compressed timeframe adds so much.
PCT Guidebooks
I started with The Wilderness Press Books, added Yogis Guide mostly for it's town information and picked up the awesome Data Book when I temporarily lost my bounce box. The most important books of the year without doubt. Although, it is pretty hard to get lost on the PCT. Yogis guide is excellent for what it is, mostly town information, but occasional gems of trail and water related advice. The data book is pure numbers and is wonderful with very few mistakes. Just don't plan your day around the 'Grade' column. The Wilderness Press Books... Maps were fine, could be better, but definitely the most useful pages. Town information generally outdated, likewise with water information. Route description was painful, too much chatter, fill, whining and crap. Took an irritating, know-it-all tone and was either frustratingly vague or needlessly detailed.
News of the Year
That half day watching coverage of the fires in Victoria was horrible. Aside from that I spent much of the year in places where news is irrelevant. December 17 gave the world this little piece of magic though: http://news.ninemsn.com.au/entertainment/984812/trained-up-ninja-monkeys-turn-on-trainer. You couldn't make this up. Well, yes, I guess you could, still... Brilliant.City of the Year
Portland wass awesome, but Kathmandu was ridiculous. Vibrant, filthy, delicious, cheap, explore, explore, explore. Loved working out it's tricks, always being a little lost and finding ways to save even one more Rupee. Mo Mo Place, you were wondrous.
Restaurant of the Year
On the between Chicago and Milwaukee with Bergan, greasy American perfection was discovered. No idea what it was called, standard diner/Dennys/IHOP/et al fare except...
"What's the all-you-can-eat bit then? The salad bar?"
"No, you can get a re-order. Basically you get whatever meal you ordered again."
WOW
"And I can do this as many times as I so desire?"
"Sure."
"Splendid."
Food of the Year
Peanut M&M's, the food that was all my food for two days. Compliments to the always reliable Banana/Chapati combination that helped me through the minefield of delicious that is India.
Campsite of the Year
High on the Pacific Crest between the Northern Yosemite boundary and Sonora Pass. Huge sunset, bigger sunrise, 360 views, good company, no mosquito's, no tent.
Fall of the Year
Reddy into the cold, wet, muddy mud half a mile before the very end of the PCT at 8pm after a cold, wet day. So funny. So sad. His trekking pole completely disappeared too. I spent five minutes looking for it the next day, there was only so far it could have possibly gone. Maybe Sasquatch took it? Keep an eye out for that blurry trekking pole thieving PNW Sasquatch.
River of the Year
Three way tie: The filthy Ganges, The massive Columbia and The cross me again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again Yellowstone
Peak Bag of the Year
Tinker Knob. Mostly because of the name. Oh yes.
Bus of the Year
As awful as those subcontinental buses were (sixteen damn hours) at least they didn't leave me at the US/Canada border. Thanks Greyhound.
Singapore Airlines Award
For the second year running, Singapore Airlines. So comfortable. So frustrating.
Fun Fact About Germans of the Year
They all eat cereal all the time.
I Don't Think I Heard A Single Piece Of Aussie Hip-Hop All Year... Awesome! Award
Sportsperson of the Year
Daniel Vettori. The man can do no wrong. Aside from his outstanding captaincy and off-field duties he managed 41.96 (59.92 in tests) with his awkwardly efficient batting and a solid as always 31.58 with the ball across all formats. On behalf of New Zealand. Thank you Daniel. Thank you.
Person of the Year
The guy who gave myself, Todd and Monologue a ride from Independence to the Onion Valley Trail Head. I won't go into too much detail. Southern Redneck Stereotype to the extreme. Thanks for the ride, but what a dick.
Conversations of the Year
At Gorakhpur Train Station when all we wanted was to get a Retiring Room because waiting ten hours at Indian train stations is shit. Apparently a fathers name is a requirement of hiring said room. The female Attendant clearly did not want to help us in any way.
Woman: What is your name!
Anthony: Anthony.
Woman: What is your fathers name!
Anthony: Anthony. (because it is)
Woman: What is your name!
Anthony: Anthony.
Woman: What is your fathers name!
Anthony: Anthony.
Woman: Then what is your name!!
Anthony: Anthony...
Woman: What. Is. Your. Fathers. Name!!
This went on for a while, with attempts at explaining how two people can share the same name. We didn't get the room.
Then there was this near Deadfall Lakes on the PCT, had a chat with a very nice older couple on an overnight with houses on their backs. Probably slightly exaggerated.
Her: That's a small pack.
Me: Yeah, I don't have that much stuff with me.
Her: How much does it weigh.
Me: Not sure, maybe fifteen pounds without food and water...
Her: You don't carry food!?!?
Me: Well, yes, I just meant...
Her: I can't believe you don't carry food!
Me: No, I do have food.
Her: What do you eat?
Me: ...
I can see this conversation's going nowhere. I shall continue this way while you continue that way.
And the oft repeated
Hiker: Hi.
Me: Hello.
Hiker: I'm _____.
Me: Nice to meet you, I'm Heaps. (the trail name thing)
Hiker: Apes?
Me: Heaps.
Hiker: Eeps?
Me: ...
Hiker: Oh, Hapes?
Me: Heaps.
Hiker: Spell that?
Me: H. E. A. P. S.
Hiker closes their eyes looks up and to the right and imagines those letters written on a giant blackboard in their mind.
Hiker: What does that mean?
Me: ...
I can see this conversation's going nowhere
I am Awesome
Coming down off Whitney in running shoes and hands as mountaineers trudged up in crampons and axes.
I Suck
I don't care if you all just did it. It is not possible to open a bottle with a lighter. It's also not possible to eat five pounds of pancake. Dammit.
Moment of the Year
When the ants finished what a Kea started. Why did nature want to eat my tent so badly?
