After our knees collide.

http://www.mcsweeneys.net/2010/12/21mustian.html

It's hard to listen to a word you're saying when you're spitting in my ACE.

I clearly didn't learn a thing from this.
I always though of myself as kind of something like pretty good at Freecell.

That's right.
I play Freecell.

I'm not going to say what my best streak is but I thought it was impressive.
It's not.
And I thought my win percentage was about as good as you can realistically expect.
It's not.
Apparently, I suck.
http://jeffwerner.ca/2007/01/freecell_best_s.html (this guy feels my pain)
http://www.solitairelaboratory.com/fcfaq.html

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Freecell

This is exactly what Rob warned me about.
I am humbled.

Can't even know.

http://tmagazine.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/12/16/now-heating-pop-art-pop-tarts/?ref=t-magazine

Huh, you're serious yeah?

Just sat there, as your plane took off.

Fire fights!
Fire fights!
Fire fights!
Fire fights!
Fire fights!
Fire fights!
Fire fights!
Fire fights!
Fire fights!
    Fire fights!!!!


Back in New Zealand, already miss America. I do.
What happened on the Eighth? I didn't have one...`

Let go...

Canyon De Chelly National Monument, Arizona.

Arches national Park, Utah.

Death Valley National Park, California.

Racetrack Playa! D-D-D-Death Valley.

Portland.

...

Best ice cream. Curiously good beer.

Seattle from Paul's balcony.

The end...

Teach Me How To Dougie.

Yas experiences the joy of XXXXL.

White Sands National Monument.

Carlsbad Caverns National Park

 

Mural. Roswell, New Mexico.

Thanks, Tim.

Pottery fragments, near Grants New Mexico.

 

Grand Canyon National Park.

Yeah, that's exactly what it looks like.

Zion National Park.

 

Hoover Dam!!

Mr State Farm vs Ms Progressive.

Flying home tomorrow, arriving home in three days time or something like that.
Post CDT went a little like this:

White Sands, Grand Canyon, Roswell, The ToC! Zion, Carlsbad Caverns, Vegas and regular buffet stops with Tim, Nina and Yas and one sweet van. Seeing everyone in San Lorenzo again and visiting Hugo and Carole in Grants who we had a blast exploring with. Stealing WiFi, running out of petrol on the Interstate, sleeping beside highways and eating more poptarts. Bizarre.
Continuing High Gravity Larger and associated beverages Sample Tour. The Core was horrid and features an immediate hangover. Loko is wonderful, shame about the bans, I guess the alcohol + caffeine thing is over... Wait, could you Irish up that coffee? Jager up that Red Bull? Black Heart up my Coke?
A mighty seventeen degrees of Fahrenheit at the Grand Canyon, and that guy that had his line stolen by Tim and Nina. "You stole my line motherfuckers" was quite literally what he said. What does that even mean? You're on a trail that resembles a sidewalk. Learn how to walk. Dick. Aside from that, GC was well friendly and incredible.
Listening to 28 Days and spreading the Bogan word to innocent Americans.
Any Cool Kids ft. Tennille, best.

Canyon De Chelly, Zion, Arches, Bridges, Extraterrestrial Highway (!!!), Death Valley and Vegas, again, with Kristin.
Learning the secrets of the Vampire Deer of Zion NP. Yeah that's right, Harold, I know. Went back 'cause it's worth it. Arches NP was exactly what I wanted.
Baffled by Utah's wonky animal signs and random herds of wild donkeys walking the main street of that town I cannot remember. Death Valley was hot and wonderful and Racetracks!! Not looking forward to running that, but I will.

Back to Portland, rainy, freezing, wonderful Portland. Via Vegas. Again again. Three times for a total of less than twenty-four hours. Vegas is anything you want it to be, especially at 6am on a Saturday morning. Stayed with Mike and Naomi and drank proper beer Portland style and more Loko maybe. Best city in America still. Overwhelmed myself with internetz and ate some sausages and some beans. Tried not to spend too much at Powell's. Went to the coast which I loved, ran on the beach eventually and naked swam on the other side of the pacific in the dark on my own very briefly. Cold and awkward.
Finally got to go to a Costco, very exciting. Finally got to watch a Ducks game, they didn't put on fifty, I feel let down. Watched LOGO a lot. Beyond amazing.

Met Paul and Melissa and friends then up to Seattle. Hung out and good times. Stumbled across the Fremont Troll unintentionally, which was nice, I wanted to see it. Ruined Paul's life when I introduced him to the glory of Brown Cardigan (over there). No Salmon.
Read this wonderfully agreeable piece: The Odds of That. Where the hell was I eight years ago?

Thirty-five hour train down to LA, past all the good stuff in the dark. Met up with Scout and here I am in San Diego.

Thanks to Tim, Nina, Yas, Kristin, Mike, Naomi, Paul, Melissa, Barney and Sandy for the company, beds, food, driving, laughs, fun and being some of the best people I know. I'm going to miss this country.

Still the best cover of any book ever.

Kill the cool kids.

Hey, I just lost that last little sliver of respect I had for Henry Rollins.




Insecure, Henry?
http://streetbonersandtvcarnage.com/blog/rollins-vs-hipsters/

http://streetbonersandtvcarnage.com/blog/hey-teacher-leave-those-kids-alone/
http://newyork.timeout.com/things-to-do/this-week-in-new-york/8355/why-the-hipster-must-die


I don't even care if Gavin's taking the piss a little. He's still right. And that Christian Lorentzen article is garbage to a point where it's not even remotely funny how much he has no clue.
That was a poorly constructed sentence right there.
Fuck your anti-hipster bullshit.

I can unlock all of your locks.

Michael's Le CDT plans and challenges (I want more challenges. Challenge me):

1. 1000 Poptart Challenge (wonder if they would sponsor me....)
2. 100 mile One Candy Challenge (maybe).
3. One Meal One Section Challenge (I swear I'll do it this time).
4. McUltimate Challenge.
5. Double Double Down Challenge.
6. Break the 50 mile day Challenge.
7. Cut down the casual swearing Challenge.
8. On Trail Zero Day.
9. No Beard this year because it looks awful.
10. Only use my tarp if I really have to. Cowboy!
11. 10+ Peak Bags. At least.
12. Actually take photos of interesting things. I'm going to be one of those ultra-irritating camera all the time people, if my camera co-operates. 

That was me in early June. So how successful was I? How proud would June Michael be of November Michael?

1. Oh yeah.
2. 108 Miles. Thanks Timmy. Never again.
3. After completing the previous challenge, this one seemed somewhat redundant.
4. Forgot...
5. Nope.
6. I still hate the fact that I was sick that day. Dangnit.
7. Nope, joker didn't help...
8. Nope, got a nero in the Winds, that's about it.
9. Yes! No beard!
10. Montana was too wet and I never was able to trust Wyoming. Colorado I cowboyed a lot and probably slept out all but six nights in New Mexico. Also, was rained on once in each state, delightful.
11. And how.
12. Nope. Thankfully, RT took piles of amazing photos.

5/12 I suck.

And that is it for the CDT. Done. Awesome. Thanks. Word.

When you attempt things like this,

The Heaps Recovery Position is oft required.

Yas has his version, I'm sure it is better.

Cake.

Hawkeye's needs more horizontal.

Half-dozen Hotdogs.

Credit to Ben, my co-creator (in ChCh with 2 litres of icecream).

Photos by RT again.

Hey! Remember when I was complaining about the giant lump in my Thermarest?

Dangnit.

Northernorthern Newew ¡Mexico!

 Box Canyon!!!

Saint Johns (they were right, you were magnificent).

Drinking the source of the Rio Grande.

Wonderful hiking and distracting views. The rubbly mountains could have used a dusting of snow but I'm not complaining.

Hawkeye and Kombucha hiding from a hailstorm.

The day it rained. And then it rained some more. It didn't stop. We death marched.

Wigwam for ever.

Yeah, we did.