Hey man I just want some muesli.

I'm not really sure what this, other than completely amazing. It doesn't matter anyway. Because it's completely amazing. Yeah I said that twice. Apparently this is going to be a 'thing' (like the Rick Astley thing...) but remember who showed you first.

Hello, is this President Clinton? Good! I figured if anyone knew where to get some Tang it would be you.

To anyone that thinks drinking a longneck in the shower is either gross, a worrying sign of
alcoholism or a little pathetic, I invite you to actually try it. Everything is better in the shower.

I have been reading a bit about Joseph Kittinger and his high altitude jumps for the USAF Project Excelsior. With a grand total of about 24 seconds of skydiving free fall under my belt I struggle to comprehend four-and-a-half minutes.
This is from his third, and highest, jump (full resolution). That's 31,333 metres above the New Mexican Desert floor. Twenty-six free falling kilometres later he opens his main chute. All this after loosing consciousness on his first jump, to be saved only by his automatic chute. I got to get my B.A.S.E. jumping plans in order. This gives me itchy jumping feet.
And yes, it's the footage used in 'Dayvan Cowboy'. Which is magic.

Alternatively, if you ever feel like watching a film review that is as long as a film, may I suggest the 70 minute epic on Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace. So good.

Ever upward indeed.

I wish you weren't so polite. Then I could hate you more.

You probably already heard about this guy. I wonder if he's that irritatingly self-righteous and persistent about everything... No, I don't mean that. It's good to see Internet stalking being used for good, and not even thieves like thieves. Kind of creepy what you can do with the Internet. Creepy. Creepy like when I was watching Hillsong TV in Seattle. Get your own damn Pentecostal megachurch America.

Imagine if this was the last thing you ever saw. I know I'd die a happy man.

See, I did learn stuff at TAFE.

I have been ruined.

http://thisiswhyyourefat.com/

I threw up in my mouth a little.
Hilarious, disgusting, intriguing excess. This is why I love America. I'd try everything there for sure. And I've created equally worse things, Jelly Pie (yes!), Cinnamon ice-cream on lamb (magic) and chocolate sauce caesar salad (disgusting). But wow.
The 'Meatini' and that giant scotch-egg thing are ridiculous. This dessert feat. bacon thing is getting out of hand.
Actually, after fifteen pages I am physically ill. The 'Fool's Gold Loaf Sandwich' was my breaking point.

In celebration of Autralia Day...

...allow me to remind you why New Zealand is the greatest place ever invented.

It's delicious.











The clouds are awesome.









I have exciting knee troubles when there.









The trails are made from mud.











Thurlow always gets massive hangtime (greatest photo ever).









It has Stewart Island, part I.









It has Stewart Island, part II.









It has the best sunsets.









And the best ice-cream.









And these bastard, tent-eating animals.









It has spacious accommodations.











Sometimes, the weather is nice.




See, it's trying.





There are penis-shaped rocks.




Thanks for your time.
NZ.

Just four.

First look at the Toy Story Lego. It's going to be difficult to not buy any. Well done Lego. Makes up for a decade without Pirates (although the new pirate series isn't too bad) and taking a couple of years to create new blasters for the Star Wars Sets.
I've wasted much of the day playing Fishy. TAFE memories. And trying to remember anything about this mysterious and awesome problem game I used to waste hours on. I remember balloons and nails and vague cartoony images. Damn brain.
Neither the NFC of the AFC championship games went the way I would have liked. And I care about that more than I expected.
Baker has been teasing me all week. Counting down the days till I'm hiking again. Not literally.

Most of it's about Dashboard Confessional. I don't think I've ever lisened to one of his songs.

If there is a fire in the stairwell do I use the elevator? Or are stairwells fireproof? What is plan B?? TELL ME!!!

Avatar.
Oh man. What an amazing movie. Completely. Sure, it's just a big dumb action movie with some awful dialogue and the worst English word of all time, 'Unobtanium' (even typing it makes me feel dirty). But what a big dumb action movie. The 3D aspect makes it required cinema viewing. I still find 3D kind of lame and annoying, like when a gun or spear is waved in your face, but the depth it adds to shots of Pandora is stunning. And the floaties (bugs, seeds, etc) are so well done. Giovanni Ribisi and Michelle Rodriguez both play their standard characters well, as usual. Sam Worthington is solid and Stephen Lang is effectively, douchily irritating. Massive respect to Zoe Saldana for making Neytiri completely and awkwardly hot. And to the writers for not making Tsu'tey (Laz Alonso) the pain-in-the-ass character he so could of been.
And as for all the criticism. Shut up. You people are annoying and have little or no valid points about anything. Stop looking for things that are not there assholes.

Theophilus London.
Kid is good. Really good. Nice flow and delivery.
Humdrum Town (just try get it out of your head. Man)
JAM! mixtape (cause I like it better than This Charming Mixtape)

The Life of Pi by Yann Martel.
Until Wikipedia ruined it for me this was the most original take on the shipwrecked/castaway/lost at sea story you've heard so many times before. It's still one of my favourite books of recent times though. Read it.

How I Met Your Mother.
Still awesome and not appreciated nearly enough.
"...stuck in my head like a Chumbawamba song."
"Which Chumbawamba song?"

The Hilltop Hoods have a market outside of Australia? No way. Touring Canada now.